The years keep rolling by but there seem to be unchanging certainties in the universe. Girls will drive boys mad til the end of time, Everything dies/evolves/becomes conscious, and Brian Kelly will win Rockem Sockem no matter what. BK did it again this year, winning the title for the third straight season and 4th overall, this is getting absurd. Standings are below as well as a season review and some awards:


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Last standings update: Thu Oct 04 04:45am EDT

While BK cleared away over August things were in the mix and unlike last year when Brian literally owned the league this one contained at least some drama, especially on the final day. Tom was the cause of much of the drama leaping back into the fray (a place he hadn't been since April) with a dramatic 4.5 point positive swing catapulting him into second place and eating for free after a roller coaster season. Well if you are going to make a major run, best to do it on the last day of the season. That run put 3rd place in jeopardy but my NOLA Crawdaddies held on to finish in the top 3 and claim a piece of the free dinner meal. After a first half where my team was the clear class of the league major injuries to my first 5 offensive picks cleared the way for BK (and Tom) to jump ahead as I barely held on to 3rd place by a half point….

Which meant one of the most consistent performers all year Birdie would be eked out and slip to the dreaded 4th spot. Not an easy pill to swallow especially when Wins were the fluctuating category on the last day and Max Scherzer was pulled by Jim Leyland in the fourth with the Tigers winning. One more inning pitched and Birdie would be in the money…that is how close and cut-throat Rockem can be. A great season by Bird ends sourly. Bull pulled into 5th with a strong finish putting pressure on everyone above him, as did 6th place finishing Winston. Both round out the top half of the league with strong closes that kept every category in play until the final day effecting the 2nd and 3rd place slots.

Moon managed until the end gaining some late streaming CG's (is there anything sweeter?) that threw things into flux but in the end his pitching overall let him down. Eben and the Rhinos were 8th after making some vicious waves around the mid-season mark, but when the fall hit Eben's team moved onto politics apparently. Mike was mired in the doldrums for most of the season but classed up his side to finish above double digits in the 9th pole position.

Don and Don are a match made in heaven and apparently in the bottom third of the table, Fatone went out like a house on fire then just as quickly burned to the ground as McNally hung around the lower half most of the season. It isn't often Last place in Rockem deserves praise but Jay Vig had a disastrous start to the campaign and managed to make things respectable, even finishing second to the champ in HR's, that right there is how insane Rockem can be.

Continuing a tradition that is Meah at best…unlike this picture which is Boosh at worst.

MVRSFP- The Most Valuable Rockem Sockem Fantasy Player goes to….
Ryan Braun

When we were drafting it pained BK to grab Braun with the 9th pick, the taint of PED's still hung in the air, could he reproduce without the Juice? 41 Dongs and 30 Sb's while batting .319 with over 100 rbi's and runs? Second rated player in the god dam game?!? Braun proved Juice or not he is a cornerstone fantasy commodity going forward for the new millennium, and one of the major reasons BK has won his god damn fourth Rockem Sockem Eets a Boat.

Rockem Sockem CY- Goes to the best fantasy pitcher this year, and the voters have spoken:
R.A. Dickey

Did anyone ever see this one coming? A 37 year old Knuckleballer having a career year, and one for the ages. Nope, no one did. When BK made the trade for Dickey it sealed his victory as Dickey went on to become the highest rated pitcher in our league, splitting his time between 2 teams, but giving the champ 2 needed CG's and a strikeout per inning. Shout outs should be given to Verlander, Price and Cain, but in the end it is all about the Dickey.

The Zeddemore Poles Coach of the Year Award: Goes to the best Rockem Manager (named for Winston's Historic 11 point last day jump in 2008):

Brian Kelly: C-Town Highpockets

This one was tough but in the end how can you not give it to he man who has won 4 titles overall and three back to back to back, and never won the coach of the year award?!? World Class Bk. World Class. (Now Retire). Brian did a dynamite job but others in the running were Gallagher with his late leap into 2nd place, Moon with his 94 moves and most importantly Jay Vig who had an epically shitty start to things (16.5 points?!?) and managed to at least make it respectable. In the end though BK deserves all the praise.

The Eric Hinske Memorial (he's dead right?!) goes to the Biggest Bust of the Year:
Dustin Pedroia

This one (as always) has lots of contenders, but the other big disappointments like Kemp, Votto, Bautista, TT (we will get to him), all had major injuries that were not typical run of the mill nicks…Pedroia on the other hand had 563 at bats and still was only the 8th best 2nd baseman in the game. Granted his Red Sox sucked overall completely, and Sparky Anklebitter hates him some Bobby V, but even with all that, you would expect DP to perform in the butt and vag on the field.

The Edwin Encarnacion Elation goes to the biggest positive surprise of the year who was drafted late (after 10th Round)
Edwin Encarnacion

I realized I didn't have an award for a player who was drafted and turned out to be a huge surprise for a team, so Double E gets his name on something because he is winning the first. Drafted in the 16th round by BK EE was supposed to be a fill in CI, but went on to produced the 10th overall player rating for this year. There is no doubt that without EE's 42 Hr's 110 Rbi's BK would have been slumming it like the rest of us…with it though he allowed BK to not even break a sweat the last 2 months.

The Nomar Broken Everything Award (Player's injuries who sink a team):
Troy Tulowitzki

Surprisingly this doesn't go to Justin Morenau for once! This other Canadian…this mullethead has to be a canuck right? cleans up this years Nomar award with just a gut wrenching injury plagued season. only active for 181 at bats Tulo was highly coveted by lots of people and when Wilson got him, things pretty much started going down hill from there. Also in the running for this shitty award were Jose Bautista, Joey Votto, Evan Longoria and Jacoby Ellsbury, but in the end no one gets it up like TT Boy.

The Cliff Lee Award: (FA Pickup that changes the league, named for Bull snatching Lee in Rockem 7)
Mike Trout

Mike Trout was unlike anyone ever in their rookie season…Number 1 in Rockem and #1 in most of our Hearts, but most importantly Mike's Heart. Could you imagine the Oceans Blyleven without Trout? Getting all but 4 at bats from the man this season picking him up on April 25th and Dropping Sean Rod was the best move Mike made all year (and he made second most in the league 78 behind Moo's 94). A certain first round pick in 2013 Mike can say….I had him way back when.