2018_preview
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| During the 17th year of Rockem we were lucky enough to have our draft fall on the 17th day of the 3rd month so St. Patrick was looking over all of us. Who will have the luck of the Irish on their side this year? Wait a second…famine’s, | During the 17th year of Rockem we were lucky enough to have our draft fall on the 17th day of the 3rd month so St. Patrick was looking over all of us. Who will have the luck of the Irish on their side this year? Wait a second…famine’s, | ||
| - | Jesus Mary and Joseph he is handsome. Truth for a second, I love that we can be 17 fucking years into this nonsense and still get together to do this. I was vibrating on Saturday morning I was so excited. Draft day is special, you are all special, now read along while I rip apart your shitty squads. As always I am just dealing with your team as of the draft with my takes; I can’t keep track if you picked up Johnny Hotnuts or slipped the tongue to Malcolm McVultureSave. I am also doing this before I read your response to any of my questions, any connection is just serendipitous. So in Draft Order… | + | Jesus Mary and Joseph he is handsome. Truth for a second, I love that we can be 17 fucking years into this nonsense and still get together to do this. I was vibrating on Saturday morning I was so excited. Draft day is special, you are all special, now read along while I rip apart your shitty squads. |
| + | |||
| + | As always I am just dealing with your team as of the draft with my takes; I can’t keep track if you picked up Johnny Hotnuts or slipped the tongue to Malcolm McVultureSave. I am also doing this before I read your response to any of my questions, any connection is just serendipitous. So in Draft Order… | ||
| === Bone Droppers: === | === Bone Droppers: === | ||
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| //(Editors note: These were the last answers received on 4/12….) // | //(Editors note: These were the last answers received on 4/12….) // | ||
| - | |||
| === Commish’s Take: === | === Commish’s Take: === | ||
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| {{: | {{: | ||
| - | At the end of this preview you are going to see a few projected finishes in the league using apps, Yahoo!’s Rankings and my own dumb thoughts. Yahoo in particular loves Vig’s offense, and since we’ve all heard about his big stick, maybe this is the year he swings it well. Trout first was a semi surprise as Stanton seemed like a real possibility so he could combine reality and fantasy. With old (semi) reliables like Cano, Bruce, and Arreita combined with some young upside of Devers, Ray and Domingo Santana his base looks fairly solid. I am going to pin Jay’s season on one guy though. If Cody Bellinger takes the next step to superstar I think Vig has a real shot, I literally don’t know if he will (obviously) but I just feel he is going to be the tell-tale player of the Italian Stallions. Also I need to buy Vig a Freddie Freeman (Vig’s Bouncing Boy…don’t worry, you all get one) jersey as he always drafts him, speaking of people he always drafts, his patented drunken yankee run was sidelined this year by a 20 year old that needed attention…She also took his attention away from drafting anyone who saves…well he has already hooked up with her, so closing was the last thing on his mind. | + | At the end of this preview you are going to see a few projected finishes in the league using apps, Yahoo!’s Rankings and my own dumb thoughts. Yahoo in particular loves Vig’s offense, and since we’ve all heard about his big stick, maybe this is the year he swings it well. Trout first was a semi surprise as Stanton seemed like a real possibility so he could combine reality and fantasy. With old (semi) reliables like Cano, Bruce, and Arreita combined with some young upside of Devers, Ray and Domingo Santana his base looks fairly solid. |
| - | **Prediction: | + | I am going to pin Jay’s season on one guy though. If Cody Bellinger takes the next step to superstar |
| + | **Prediction: | ||
| === The Chickle Tickles: === | === The Chickle Tickles: === | ||
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| 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | ||
| - | I know Fatty had a medical issue but perhaps we should get Eben checked out . HIs signature on my baseball clearly looks like early onset Parkinson’s | + | I know Fatty had a medical issue but perhaps we should get Wilson |
| === Commish’s Take: === | === Commish’s Take: === | ||
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| **Prediction: | **Prediction: | ||
| - | |||
| === The Pine Taaars: === | === The Pine Taaars: === | ||
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| 6) Favorite moment of Rockem 17 Draft? | 6) Favorite moment of Rockem 17 Draft? | ||
| - | Eben sitting by himself with zero draft material and still drafting a halfway decent team. | + | Wilson |
| 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | ||
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| 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | ||
| - | Bagel-less. I mean for real. Jeff had set the precedence for years and then just stops without telling anyone? Its like if Vig decided not to get drunk and fall asleep or Eben started pronouncing players names correctly. I just don't know what to think anymore. Also, I spent most of the time texting picks to toothless Don, so really had to pay attention. Should have just gotten blind drunk with the rest of you. | + | Bagel-less. I mean for real. Jeff had set the precedence for years and then just stops without telling anyone? Its like if Vig decided not to get drunk and fall asleep or Wilson |
| 2) One pick you were stoked about, One you should have changed? | 2) One pick you were stoked about, One you should have changed? | ||
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| **Prediction**: | **Prediction**: | ||
| - | |||
| === C-Town Highpockets === | === C-Town Highpockets === | ||
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| Drafting physically next to the champ is always a trip. No one sweats it out, second guesses or has so many guys taken that he had his eye on than BK. The Champ Is Here! | Drafting physically next to the champ is always a trip. No one sweats it out, second guesses or has so many guys taken that he had his eye on than BK. The Champ Is Here! | ||
| - | < | + | < |
| (and awfully nervous) | (and awfully nervous) | ||
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| **Prediction**: | **Prediction**: | ||
| - | |||
| === Ocean’s Blyleven: === | === Ocean’s Blyleven: === | ||
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| 6) Favorite moment of Rockem 17 Draft? | 6) Favorite moment of Rockem 17 Draft? | ||
| - | Haha… Gotta be the balls! That gracious act by Donald McNally will forever be tied to Kip Winger and Rockem 17. All signatures were on POINT! Everybody walking around to get ‘em signed was GREAT! And I really loved when LINES started to form for people!?! So. Much. Fun.\\ | + | Haha… Gotta be the balls! That gracious act by Donald McNally will forever be tied to Kip Winger and Rockem 17. All signatures were on POINT! Everybody walking around to get ‘em signed was GREAT! And I really loved when LINES started to form for people!?! So. Much. Fun. |
| - | 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | + | |
| + | \\ | ||
| + | 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | ||
| + | |||
| + | Love you all. And, in case any of you missed it on draft day, I’m totally gonna get the first completely signed baseball when I head back west. | ||
| === Commish’s Take: === | === Commish’s Take: === | ||
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| **“It' | **“It' | ||
| - | Do you really need to read this? Didn’t you hear me insult him all draft? This team sucss…wait a second…Maybe you should read this…as Bobby sang… | + | Do you really need to read this? Didn’t you hear me insult him all draft? This team sucss…wait a second…Maybe you should read this…as Bobby sang… < |
| - | + | ||
| - | < | + | |
| Even though that song makes me think of Wilson every time I hear it, this year it pertains to Mike. During the draft it kinda became a bit, but when doing this preview I started to come around on the man’s squad…that sounds dirtier than it should. While the Max pick is still a tad shocking things seemed to fall into place after that. Sanchez Springer Cuz and Myers (Mike’s Bouncing Boy) will all put up numbers if they aren’t exactly sexy. | Even though that song makes me think of Wilson every time I hear it, this year it pertains to Mike. During the draft it kinda became a bit, but when doing this preview I started to come around on the man’s squad…that sounds dirtier than it should. While the Max pick is still a tad shocking things seemed to fall into place after that. Sanchez Springer Cuz and Myers (Mike’s Bouncing Boy) will all put up numbers if they aren’t exactly sexy. | ||
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| **Prediction: | **Prediction: | ||
| - | + | === Tangled Upton Blue: === | |
| - | ===Tangled Upton Blue: === | + | |
| 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | ||
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| **Prediction: | **Prediction: | ||
| - | |||
| === Spearmint Rhinos: === | === Spearmint Rhinos: === | ||
| 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | 1) How would you rate your draft (feel free to create your own scale)? | ||
| - | A 7.5 on the diabetes sugar test (3-5.5 is healthy). For I spent the entire draft fielding questions about whether or not I had Parkinsons Disease. Bull started it. Tom later leapt on with comparisons to Michael J. Fox, and so it goes. " | + | A 7.5 on the diabetes sugar test (3-5.5 is healthy). For I spent the entire draft fielding questions about whether or not I had Parkinsons Disease. Bull started it. Tom later leapt on with comparisons to Michael J. Fox, and so it goes. " |
| 2) One pick you were stoked about, One you should have changed? | 2) One pick you were stoked about, One you should have changed? | ||
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| 3) Whose team are you most impressed with? | 3) Whose team are you most impressed with? | ||
| - | Don's. Either, of course, but actually McNallys. I think his team's got legs this year. He took a Winstonian amount of time on a few of those picks. We'd start to habitually yell at Jeff, only to spot an empty seat and then look over to see Don frantically staring at a computer screen, belaboring critical decisions. That happens when people get pregnant. Critical decisions come slower, sex gets better, you start stressing over space and color schemes like some coked-up interior designer from the 80s, and undergirding every thought is the notion that some erections can cost you upwards of a half-million dollars. That changes a man. It upends his thinking. And if one's Rockem team has historically been a loser, it follows that screwy hormones will change one's approach and foster a winner. You want to turnaround your Rockem team? Knock somebody up. (For further reading, see Birdie). 4) Unfortunately we had a last minute cancellation and we all feel sorry for him, the draft was lesser because of his absence…but what really happened to Fatone??!? He stopped into a church, he passed along the way. He got down on his knees, and he began to pray. California dreaming. In truth I can't say what happened to Fatone. Inference, in his lone case, would only insult the possibilities and undoubtedly come up short. For I know what happens when I'm with Fatone. We all do. Sit on that for a minute. What happens when he doesn' | + | Don's. Either, of course, but actually McNallys. I think his team's got legs this year. He took a Winstonian amount of time on a few of those picks. We'd start to habitually yell at Jeff, only to spot an empty seat and then look over to see Don frantically staring at a computer screen, belaboring critical decisions. That happens when people get pregnant. Critical decisions come slower, you start stressing over space and color schemes like some coked-up interior designer from the 80s, and undergirding every thought is the notion that some erections can cost you upwards of a half-million dollars. That changes a man. It upends his thinking. And if one's Rockem team has historically been a loser, it follows that screwy hormones will change one's approach and foster a winner. You want to turnaround your Rockem team? Knock somebody up. (For further reading, see Birdie). |
| + | |||
| + | 4) Unfortunately we had a last minute cancellation and we all feel sorry for him, the draft was lesser because of his absence…but what really happened to Fatone??!? | ||
| + | |||
| + | He stopped into a church, he passed along the way. He got down on his knees, and he began to pray. California dreaming. In truth I can't say what happened to Fatone. Inference, in his lone case, would only insult the possibilities and undoubtedly come up short. For I know what happens when I'm with Fatone. We all do. Sit on that for a minute. What happens when he doesn' | ||
| 5) As we approach middle to late age for all of us…is the draft finally getting too long? Should we look into Pace of Draft rules? | 5) As we approach middle to late age for all of us…is the draft finally getting too long? Should we look into Pace of Draft rules? | ||
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| 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | 7) Anything To Say to your competitors? | ||
| - | You will be having the victory dinner this year in Washington, DC, at an establishment called Archibalds. Fair warning, it has no champagne room. However–and to paraphrase the study tapes my mother once bought me in middle school–" | + | You will be having the victory dinner this year in Washington, DC. |
| === Commish’s Take: === | === Commish’s Take: === | ||
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| Ahh but old habits die hard and old names are tough not to call out in a draft room. Sally Perez? Kinsler? Zimmerman (Wilson’s Bouncing Boy) returns home, drafts Pham high but are those stats repeatable? Perhaps the most interesting thing is Wilson' | Ahh but old habits die hard and old names are tough not to call out in a draft room. Sally Perez? Kinsler? Zimmerman (Wilson’s Bouncing Boy) returns home, drafts Pham high but are those stats repeatable? Perhaps the most interesting thing is Wilson' | ||
| - | **Prediction: | + | **Prediction: |
| - | {{: | + | {{: |
| === Honey Nut Ichiros === | === Honey Nut Ichiros === | ||
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| 3) Whose team are you most impressed with? | 3) Whose team are you most impressed with? | ||
| - | Eben, impressed with the closer drafting strategy….lets see if it pans out this year | + | Wilson, impressed with the closer drafting strategy….lets see if it pans out this year |
| 4) Unfortunately we had a last minute cancellation and we all feel sorry for him, the draft was lesser because of his absence…but what really happened to Fatone??!? | 4) Unfortunately we had a last minute cancellation and we all feel sorry for him, the draft was lesser because of his absence…but what really happened to Fatone??!? | ||
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| **Prediction**: | **Prediction**: | ||
| - | |||
| === Acuna Tabata: === | === Acuna Tabata: === | ||
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| **Prediction: | **Prediction: | ||
| - | |||
| === NOLA Crawdaddies: | === NOLA Crawdaddies: | ||
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| **“That dropped eye of yours looks like the hood on a cunt to me Jack. When you talk your mouth looks like a cunt moving.”** | **“That dropped eye of yours looks like the hood on a cunt to me Jack. When you talk your mouth looks like a cunt moving.”** | ||
| - | |||
| === Mike Ryniec Guest Preview: === | === Mike Ryniec Guest Preview: === | ||
| - | The older I get, the more I realize that there are very few good things and very few bad things in life. Mostly, it’s just how you look at all of it. The jagerbomb is either half full… or… you probably put too much red bull in it. But I digress. So how do I see Shawn’s team? I see it like this, of course! | + | The older I get, the more I realize that there are very few good things and very few bad things in life. Mostly, it’s just how you look at all of it. The jagerbomb is either half full… or… you probably put too much red bull in it. But I digress. So how do I see Shawn’s team? I see it like this, of course! |
| - | {{:happy-dance-.gif?nolink& | + | PREVIEW: Was that a draft? The Commish really outdid himself this time… |
| - | How about that pitch… Justin Verlander’s renaissance was a delight last year, particularly | + | Perennial single category contributor Dee Gordon |
| {{: | {{: | ||
| - | How about that pitch… | + | How about that pitch… |
| - | (//Editors Note: Thanks Mike for the non-committal.//) | + | PREDICTION: Bottom Third. Dare I say, last in the whole crazy thing. |
| - | **Commish Prediction**: | + | OR! maybe it looks like this…. |
| + | PREVIEW: Was that a draft! The Commish really outdid himself this time… | ||
| + | |||
| + | The opening back-to-back bats will be a race to the NL MVP – Bryant and Rizzo are ridiculous enough WITHOUT that 2B eligibility on Tony! Getting monster stats from a tough position, always a plus. Follow that up with players finally putting it all together like Trevor Story and the sexiest man alive Yasiel Puig to round out an overall woop-woop squad. | ||
| + | |||
| + | {{: | ||
| + | |||
| + | How about that pitch… Doolittle and Davis are tops, with Andrew Miller along for supreme ratios and a vulture save or two for good measure. Maybe more if Cody Allen slips at some point. Watch out! Gonna be some kinda year for Shawnee. | ||
| + | |||
| + | PREDICTION: Top Third. Dare I say, first in the whole crazy thing. | ||
| + | |||
| + | * this review inspired by my top-notch analysis of Giancarlo Stanton definitely going anywhere between the first and seventh picks. In our league? Who the heck can predict anything! | ||
| + | |||
| + | **Commish Prediction**: | ||
| === Dogzilla: === | === Dogzilla: === | ||
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| It is unfortunate Fatone couldn’t swing east this year with last minute major mouth injuries. Not sure if he sent all of you the pic of the tooth but is was gnarly…not as gnarly as his feet but I digress…gross. Drafting from home must be a weird thing for Don on one hand it is hours with the kids on the other he gets to be away from us…seriously you would think he would have a MUCH better squad. Maybe he over thinks it, maybe it’s maybelline. I have no idea where I am going with this as I wrote this full preview in one sitting and I am running out of steam as my back is barking. Let’s go to the vicodin/ | It is unfortunate Fatone couldn’t swing east this year with last minute major mouth injuries. Not sure if he sent all of you the pic of the tooth but is was gnarly…not as gnarly as his feet but I digress…gross. Drafting from home must be a weird thing for Don on one hand it is hours with the kids on the other he gets to be away from us…seriously you would think he would have a MUCH better squad. Maybe he over thinks it, maybe it’s maybelline. I have no idea where I am going with this as I wrote this full preview in one sitting and I am running out of steam as my back is barking. Let’s go to the vicodin/ | ||
| - | < | + | < |
| - | Kluber Correa. At the snake you need to dig in and go for it. Fatty did just that with a possible AL Cy Young and MVP combo then turned around and went the other white meat doubling up on Dozier and Rhys…Rhys was high on a lot of draft boards but will he produce to this level? Hmmm. Other bats that have promise….scrolling…scrolling…scrolling… umm Mazara? Maybe Thames? Wow this is a change of pace, Fatty is usually super bat heavy went the other direction this year. Kluber Archer Hamels have potential to challenge Tom for the best big three if Cole is back in form while Riverio and Iglesias add up to a decent bullpen. | + | Kluber Correa. At the snake you need to dig in and go for it. Fatty did just that with a possible AL Cy Young and MVP combo then turned around and went the other white meat doubling up on Dozier and Rhys…Rhys was high on a lot of draft boards but will he produce to this level? Hmmm. Other bats that have promise….scrolling…scrolling…scrolling… umm Mazara? Maybe Thames? Wow this is a change of pace, Fatty is usually super bat heavy went the other direction this year. |
| - | This preview started with me pinning Vig’s hopes on Bellinger, I will end it by saying I think Fatty’s team is tied to Whit Merrifield (Fatone’s Bouncing Boy). If he matches last year or even exceeds I think Fatty has a shot for free eats…but I am not betting on it. | + | Kluber Archer Hamels have potential to challenge Tom for the best big three if Cole is back in form while Riverio and Iglesias add up to a decent bullpen. |
| **Prediction: | **Prediction: | ||
| - | **Yahoo Rankings:** | + | **Yahoo Rankings: |
| + | |||
| + | {{: | ||
| - | So now Yahoo does their own predictions, | + | Yahoo thinks the Best P: BK (a lot), D Mac Worst P: Bull (by a lot), Bird |
| - | __//**Yahoo Predictions** | + | __**Yahoo Predictions** __ : |
| 96 Tangled Upton Blue\\ | 96 Tangled Upton Blue\\ | ||
2018_preview.1524888933.txt.gz · Last modified: 2018/04/28 00:15 by admin